Enhancing Women's Fashion with Physics

Using Physics and Calculus

As every woman walks, her shoulders act as fulcrums for a pendulum action of her dress. Her hips move sideways slightly as she walks which pushes the cloth of her dress sideways. It is possible to "tune" a dress to a specific woman! This emables the dress to have an enhanced "sway" as she walks, just like some Starlets know how to do. This is actually a rather simple Physics calculation regarding how a pendulum oscillates.

There are a variety of dimensions involved, such as her height and the dress fabric and thickness and how rapidly she walks, but we American males definitely notice when some movie Starlets walk down a street in a specific dress. ALL men simply call her "gorgeous". The men who notice this have no idea why they are so impressed, but all agree that this woman is "amazing"

Around twelve years ago, I figured out the calculus and the Physics for virtually ANY woman in virtually any dress can create this situation. If she is elderly, or obese, she can walk with this "swaying" action, and she WILL be noticed by all nearby men who have blood in their veins. At that time, I contacted around thirty different women's clothing manufacturers, including all the famous brands, and I found that none of them had the slightest interest in what a "scientist" might have to say. Apparently, they are as smart as they need to be, and none of them saw any reason to start producing new dresses that would destroy their competition. I never understood that attitude, but I have never really had any interest in becoming a billionaire in the women's fashion business, as Physics keeps me nicely entertained.

However, it had occurred to me that I should find a pair of slim college-aged identical twins. I would then buy two absolutely identical dresses for them, but then do some calculus and Physics to make an invisible modification inside the dress of one of them to enormously enhance that "swaying" action of her dress. I then intended to get a video camera and have the twin sisters simply walk down a sidewalk, away from the camera, maybe half a block. ALL observers of that video would totally focus on the one girl, who simply LOOKED incredibly sexy. Then the girls would turn around and walk back toward the camera. When they got close, all observers would see that they were actually identical twins.

My intention was to put such a video on U-Tube and just create confusion!

I did not even intend to have any voice-over saying anything, maybe just some quiet music in the background. The idea would simply be to mystify all the millions of viewers of the video regarding what was different of the two girls.

It seemed obvious to me that millions of the women who saw that video would immediately want to go to a store to buy that "magical dress". Wouldn't that instantly create a unique new market for hundreds of millions of dollars of new women's clothing? And the same demand would occur all over Europe and pretty much everywhere else in the world?

What I never had a chance to explain to all those Corporate Executives is that the two twins' dresses would cost less than $3 difference! If I had ever had a chance to tell any of them that fact, and the uniqueness of the dresses and the sexiness of all of them, I had expected that those Corporate Executives would have realized how fast they could earn many extra billions of dollars in clear profits!

I still do NOT permit any of those Corporate Executives to steal my invention, or anyone else, without first obtaining a Written Contract with me. The calculus and the physics is more complex than most Corporate people might understand, but I realize that in the modern world, nearly everyone seems willing to sell their own grandmother if they thought they might make a million dollars or a billion dollars or more. This article does not entirely explain how to accomplish what I have done, but such rich people certainly will hire hundreds of Physicists and mathematicians to work for them so that they could wind up with even more billions of dollars of wealth. I am just me, and I realize that I probably could never stop such stealing from occurring. But still, I decided to alert the world to this amazing new discovery, mostly in the hope that someone who would make such profits might choose to act to "save the world" in some of the ways mentioned below, with some of those profits.

Why do women buy clothes? Why do they spend hours in shopping for one specific item of clothing to buy? For a single reason, to look good, or actually, to look sexy (whatever they imagine that term means regarding them personally.)


Every man vividly remembers some woman he has seen walk by who seemed to him to be incredibly sexy. This sometimes is true even when the woman has not been physically a runway model or a Hollywood Starlet. Several famous movies have some notable scene where some starlet walked by and all men stopped what they were doing just to watch her.

I have discovered why that is. More than that, I have discovered how to use Physics and Calculus to custom design a dress or a skirt for a specific woman such that she will become such an amazingly sexy focal point!

I also see why no one in the Women's Fashion Industry has ever discovered this before, even though they certainly have all wanted to find it! Both the Calculus necessary and the Physics involved are somewhat advanced, where even most professional Mathematicians and Physicists might not be able to come up with this advance.

By the way, assuming that the "twins video" was as popular as I expect, I intended to create two follow-up videos, one of a seventy-year-old woman doing the same sidewalk walk, and the other of a fairly severely obese doing the same walk. The effect is not quite as spectacular as for the slim college-aged girl, but it is still pretty amazing. Such women are familiar with the clothing choices available to them, and I suspect that many might decide to buy such a "magical dress"


I find myself in a peculiar situation regarding this matter! I believe I can quickly and easily show each woman WHY she should want to BUY such an (generally economical) item of clothing for herself. No words or description would even be necessary, as she would see a variety of ordinary women suddenly transformed into remarkably gorgeous and stunning focal points. Young and slim women, certainly, but even women who are elderly and ones who are overweight and even obese.

SO! If 80 million American women and a comparable number in Europe and in China each saw WHY she should immediately buy a new dress for $50, isn't that around $12 billion in new sales? At a time when millions of people are out of jobs, doesn't that seem like a credible way to provide a lot of jobs to MAKE and SUPPLY those 250 million new dresses? And this is a rather conservative idea that they would each buy ONE, but the reality is that many women would insist on replacing their entire wardrobe!

This presentation was first placed on the Internet in January 2011. I do NOT give any manufacturer any authorization to use this invention unless I have given written authorization, as related in a contractual arrangement.

I am not entirely stupid, and I realize that the few giant Corporations that control the Women's Fashion Industry would not hesitate to trample over a Physicist in order to capture billions of dollars of new profits for their own Corporations!

So the moment I would disclose the details of this advance, they would each decide that they were capable of properly doing the Calculus and Physics, or they would decide to hire Mathematicians and Physicists who each felt they could properly do it, and merrily ignore me completely in their pursuit of massive new profits.

I do not see any way to keep any of them from doing that, and the result would certainly be that they would do it badly! Their women customers might certainly look better, but they likely would not be the stunning women that I believe I could enable them all to be!

Those Corporations would be so concerned on beating their competitor Corporations to those profits that there is no way that any of them would recognize that none of this could have begun without me!


Now, I do NOT want to be some hotshot Executive in the Women's Fashion Industry, and I do not even want to pile up the billions of dollars of money that I suspect I could amass from this, if that had been my motivation.

However, I DO have a motivation and a goal, where money is involved!

Even by 2004, as a Research Physicist, I knew that society has been causing horrific changes in the Earth's climate. Many people have tried to deny that, especially businesspeople whose Corporate profits would be reduced if the public got scared and reduced their buying of products. By around 2005, I had calculated that if all the ice on Antarctica would melt, the ocean levels would rise by more than 200 vertical feet. Interestingly, to confirm that, a Conference of thousands of scientists announced shortly afterward that if just the ice on Greenland all melted, the world's sea levels would rise by 22 feet. And for the first time that I have seen, in December 2010, a PBS NOVA TV program also confirmed that if all the ice on Antarctica melted, the world's oceans would rise by "fifteen stories or more" (that is, 180 vertical feet or more.) The Dec 2010 NOVA program also had a number of Antarctic researchers say that they have been amazed that the Antarctic ice is melting FAR FASTER than they had ever realized before.

Some of them even said there that they thought it realistic that by the end of this century (90 years, in 2100), that they now expect the world's oceans to have risen by 17 to 20 feet vertically. (I suspect that is a very conservative estimate.)

I have been trying to say that for several years! I almost dread the fact that they are now confirming my worst fears, all based on solid science.

I suspect that in the next year or two, at least three separate things will begin to get the public's attention regarding this Global Warming. (1) Researchers now expect that the ENTIRE Arctic Ocean will be ICE FREE in late September 2013 (not long from now!), which has never occurred for many hundred thousands of years in the past. (2) No one seems to yet get scared of this, but they should! For the past three years and more, EVERY DAY, around 150 feet of the edge of the Greenland ice sheet melts and falls off into the ocean. That is more than TEN MILES WIDE of thick ice falling off every year! And in 2010, the Researchers have said that the rate of that ice loss is rapidly increasing! Given the size of Greenland, all of the ice on it WILL have melted and fallen into the ocean well before the end of THIS century. That means that the oceans will rise by ANOTHER 22 vertical feet, in addition to whatever (20 foot???) rise occurs due to melting of some Antarctic ice! (3) This massive amount of FRESH WATER falling off of Greenland and into the North Atlantic Ocean is already apparently affecting the overall water movement patterns in the North Atlantic. This is still not known for certain, but it seems very likely that the Gulf Stream may stop rather suddenly. Why is this important? Because the Gulf Stream carries massive amounts of WARM water from the Caribbean Ocean region of the Atlantic up around Britain and the northern European countries. It is feared that if the Gulf Stream would stop carrying all that warm water northward, the climates in nearly all of northern Europe may drop by 10 or 20 degrees Fahrenheit, where life for 300 million European people may be extremely more difficult.

However, one of the worst long term effects of all this is far worse. If it is true that enough ice melts from the Greenland ice sheet and from the Antarctic ice sheet and from many melting glaciers around the world to even raise ocean levels by the 45 vertical feet that many researchers are now expecting by the year 2100, then at least 50 of the most populated cities in the world will be GONE, under the oceans! And a number of entire countries will also be gone!

Two of those countries worry me most. Bangladesh and Indonesia each currently have around 200 million residents, being two of the ten most populated nations on Earth. And they will both nearly certainly be completely under the oceans before the year 2100. In other words, while some small children living today will still be alive!


Given the way that all political leaders put off until tomorrow all decisions that might be made today, NO ONE WILL DO ANYTHING TO SAVE those hundreds of millions of people, as well as the other hundreds of millions of people in all those largest cities of the world. In fact, no one will even START to consider THINKING ABOUT any of this UNTIL they see videos of thousands and millions of people drowning! This is what human nature is!

And by the time they START to think about it, it will take years before they even TRY any of the foolish ideas they will suddenly come up with, where none of them will likely do much good. All the while, maybe a million people might be drowning every day, for years!

In other words, given how human nature works, NO credible way to save many people will be accomplished. Yes, a helicopter of six refugees will make the nightly news as having been saved that day, but a DIFFERENT million people will have drowned that same day.

The political leaders WILL suggest MOVING people to higher ground, as in some other country. But NO country will be willing or able to accept 200,000,000 refugees. They MIGHT be able to accept a few hundred, tops, as they will each be having their own problems of their biggest cities will also be disappearing into rising oceans, and they will not even have any good solutions regarding where to move THOSE tens of millions of their own people!


I feel a responsibility to try to plan ahead for these coming catastrophes. In June 2008, I had completed my Design and Engineering for a hexagon-shaped, flat-bottomed, 60-acre, floating, ocean-going barge, which I refer to as an Ark. The Ark would be filled with black dirt so that gardens and farms could grow food. Hexagons can fit together simply and easily so that larger areas can easily be assembled. Chicago is not in any danger of sinking into the ocean, as it is currently at around 600 feet above sea level, but as an example, around 1,500 of these hexagons could be lashed together to have the entire area of the City of Chicago. In other words, even with Parks and highways and Wrigley Field and all the reset, a FLOATING CITY of a very comfortable 3 million people could be able to be free of any issues of sea level rise.

People in Bangladesh do not have as much land space as people in Chicago do, so maybe 10 million or 20 million people could live on that Floating City. And making more hexagonal barges for the rest of the people of Bangladesh could enable them all to survive sealevel rise.

Better still, this new Country of Floating Bangladesh could be (slowly) moved north or south in the Indian Ocean to avoid typhoons (what we call hurricanes) and even to enhance the climate for growing their food crops.


In the one case, which is what seems certain to actually happen in coming decades, virtually the entire 200 million population of Bangladesh WILL drown horribly. In the second case, which I see as possible, nearly all of them could not only survive, but PROSPER, on floating Ark-cities!

What does any of this have to do with Women's Fashion? I feel that SOMEONE needs to build a DEMONSTRATION Ark, fairly soon, just so political leaders see that there might be an actual logical course of action.

The 60-acre Ark which I Designed and Engineered seems to require around $9 million of steel and other materials for construction, and another $9 million for the workers' labor to build it. So I see an URGENT NEED for at least $18 million, such that a Demo Ark might be made.

I do not happen to have $18 million.

And I do not happen to know any Philanthropists who might have $18 million that they might provide to build such a Demo Ark.

And so it seemed to me that the astronomical amounts of profits which seem certain regarding my application of Physics and Calculus to Women's Fashion, might inspire some Corporation to offer to build a Demo Ark, in exchange for my enabling that Corporation to make the advanced clothes for women and therefore profits so large that a measly $18 million would be pocket change (to them).

Since no one has ever built an Ark before (except once, a very long time ago!), it seems likely that unexpected complications might arise during construction of the first Demo Ark. And so I feel that it would be safer to expect to need $25 million or even $30 million to build it. Anything left over might be used toward building a second Ark!


Of course, if some Philanthropist saw merit in this planning ahead for future catastrophes (which seems to NEVER be done in modern society!), then I would not need to fool with women's fashion at all.

But I certainly could NOT divulge anything regarding the advance in Women's Fashion without an absolute commitment regarding getting the Demo Ark built.


Actually, the REAL reason for the Demo Ark is as described above, but once it is built, it seems to me that it would be a wonderful HUMANITARIAN Public Service nearly immediately. A world-class Medical Hospital could be built on a 60-acre campus space. There are Hospital Ships which only have around two acres of usable space, and they do a lot of good! In addition, there could also be dozens of huge pole barn warehouses on the Demo Ark, which each contain: (1) tens of millions of bottles of water; (2) tens of millions of MREs (meals-ready-to-eat); (3) millions of blankets; (4) millions of sleeping bags; (5) many thousands of tents; (6) massive supplies of First Aid items; (7) and all the other needs that seem always in desperately short supply after a major disaster. Specifically, the FLAT-BOTTOM, SHALLOW-DRAFT barge would have been able to have been towed to near Port-au-Prince, Haiti, within a day or two of their earthquake, and virtually immediately and continuously, the Haitian people would have been provided most of the needs for their survival.

The same would have been true after the Indonesian Tsunami, and even after the 9-11-01 attacks in the US, and the Katrina Hurricane around New Orleans.

So I feel strong motivation to try to find some way to get at least ONE Demo Ark built. By default, since I seem to have no other available source for the money needed to build it, I may wind up getting involved in Women's Fashion! Go figure! A Research Physicist!


This presentation was first placed on the Internet in January 2011.

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Carl W. Johnson, Theoretical Physicist, Physics Degree from University of Chicago